Gone are the days of the marriage that began long before kids were even a question. Enter a world where second marriages are as common as first ones, and having kids as active participants in a wedding ceremony has become more and more common. Wedding vows involving children are a great way to blend two separate families into one cohesive unit from day one. These vows and traditions will also build lasting memories for both the children as well as the parents.

Consider the Child's Age

One thing to consider before deciding to have wedding vows involving children is to determine if the kids in question are of an appropriate age. While it might be cute to have little four-year-old Johnny chime in with an "I Do" of his own, you may find that Johnny could become confused by the logistics of the wedding and ultimately won't be able to perform under pressure. With kids under the age of five, consider having them walk with one or both parents down the aisle to begin the ceremony but skip any public pronouncements or verbal vows.

The Cuteness Factor

No matter what the age, wedding vows involving children have the potential danger of weighing-in on the overly cutesy side. While it might be special and meaningful to have a new stepfather promise to listen when his stepdaughter asks for a later curfew, too many of these pronouncements can steal the thunder from the actual significance of the wedding: two families becoming one. Consider mixing two-third traditional vows with one-third "fun" vows to keep the ceremony from becoming a sideshow.

Kid to Kid Vows

If you're bringing multiple kids together because of your union, consider writing kid-to-kid vows. These vows are especially meaningful if your children will be sharing rooms for the first time or have never lived together. By asking your children to express what is important them (ie: not having a new sister borrow things without asking), you are allowing your children to create their boundaries within your new relationship.

If you want to kick the sentiment up a notch, ask your children to trade friendship rings at the ceremony. Buy similar rings for both parents to create a symbol of family unity that will be treasured for a long time to come.

Forcing the Issue

Not every soon-to-be-blended family is Brady Bunch episode worthy. Stepdaughters and stepsons may still carry serious resentment about your decision to replace their father or mother. Keeping that in mind, be particularly sensitive to the fact that having your wedding vows involving children just may not be in the cards. Make sure to ask your children how they feel about speaking during the wedding and offer up the opportunity to take on a less-visible role as a candle lighter, usher, or guest book attendant.